Carrie Ann Golden

What If My Writing Isn’t Good Enough?

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This month’s question:  What if my writing isn’t good enough?

 

This group (also endearingly known as IWSG) is all about insecurities; and gosh, I have a boat-load of them!

 

Where even to begin?

 

I’ve battled with insecurities all my life, and they’ve filtered over in to my writing life.

 

You’ll never be good enough. 

You’re worthless.

Don’t bother even trying.

 

There are so many ideas running through my head.  And I have written many of them…but, they usually die (or get placed in the trash).

I have published several items (all short ones) so that is something, I suppose.

 

But…

 

I keep feeling like I’m missing something.

Or, there is a story somewhere within that needs to be written and then released to the world.

 

But…

 

In the past, in my previous work life, I had this nasty habit of self-sabotaging myself.

Not allowing myself to experience success of any kind.

And this is quite prevalent in my life as it is in my writing life.

It’s like I feel like I don’t deserve it.

 

You’ll never be good enough.

You’re worthless.

Don’t bother even trying.

 

 

A lot of this stem from childhood abuse.  Others from a progressive disability.

Excuses, I suppose.

But they’re the Goliath in my life, and I’m the puny boy with no sling-shot or weapon of any kind.

Just a pen.

 

 

I’ve heard that a pen holds power.  I just don’t have any faith in the holder of this particular pen.

 

Am I good enough?

Will I ever be?

Do I even bother trying?

24 comments

  4. I understand totally. But what to do??? No idea. You are good enough, obviously. How many times do you need to be published to start believing in yourself? I’d say keep going.. you must have talent . Just keep going …

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  6. Insecurity happens to everyone. Sometimes you just have to plow through the roadblocks your mind throws in your way and remind yourself that YOU are in charge. No one else. And it really is true that belittling words say more about the speaker than the listener. Don’t listen!

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  8. I don’t know a writer yet who doesn’t say those same things, even those who’ve been published for years. We just have to try our best. Good luck to you.

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  9. Self-doubt is very crippling for any writer. I struggle with that, too. I ask myself those same questions. It’s like I’m pushing the positivity aside and am clinging onto the negativity.

    I haven’t submitted anything to a contest or magazine in a long time. I doubt that I can write anything of substance. I read works from my peers. I read the tweets and posts about getting agents and getting published. I tell myself that I’ll never get to that point. I’ll never be a successful writer as long sad I write short stories. And even then, I feel like the stories I read are so much better than mine. So I stuff them away. I keep them in my flash drive, some unfinished.

    Sometimes, I wonder why I keep writing, knowing the doubt and fear I have. But here’s the thing. I can’t imagine myself not writing. I like what I do. And I want people to know what I’m capable of. But I have to tell myself that I can’t write for the approval of anybody else. Not everyone will like my work. I will be rejected. And I think when I fully embrace that fact, the happier I will be when something will be accepted. The last statement sounds like an oxymoron, but it makes sense to me.

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      • I think so. We’re so inclined to believe the negative because we’re certain that it will happen. We’re cautious about the positive because sometimes it sounds too good to be true. Sometimes it is, and we get hurt when the opposite happens.

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  10. I go through this myself a lot of the time. Like you, I have had some small things published and that gives me the courage to keep on going. I know that because I’ve achieved some small success, I will eventually have my short stories and novels published. For me, sending out my work is my biggest challenge, because that’s when the doubts really show itself. I recently submitted to a short story anthology, but was unsuccessful. I was surprised at how well I took it and figured I must be getting that thick skin at long last. It takes a long time, but you’ll get there. You can do this!

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  12. If you’ve written a while, a decade or more, then this question is appropriate. It’s likely a question that many published authors ought to ask.
    But while you’re sitting around wondering, begin looking at writing of others and truly try to criticize it. News media – has gotten worse and worse. Essays – to learn how Essays ought to be written read George Orwell. Read a few pieces of literature but give no breaks – the author has flatulence that day and that’s why her writing fell off. The old man was dead drunk but put 2000 words on the page. Both writers want to sell their daily production.
    Look for and determine whether what is important to you in writing, is important in the writing you’re reading. Is the tale told efficiently? Did the author use 50 words to say something rather than five word, Etc.
    Once you have written out an evaluation of that novel, you have an idea of the standards you believe are important in writing. You will gain confidence in yourself and what you write.
    AT THAT POINT YOU HAVE TAKEN A STEP TOWARD BEING A PROFESSIONAL IN THIS ACTIVITY.

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